Why do it at all?

What is the point of prioritizing, setting goals and spending hour after hour organizing a life in pursuit of those goals?

For each of the answer is unique.  As this is my blog, I guess it is my turn to speak about my “why”.

I have had a most generous and loving life. 

I have family who care for me and support me.  I would love to find some way to give to my family: my mother; my daughters; my partner; my brother and his family; my aunts and uncle; my cousins; and the newest additions, my grandsons.  I see me working for this purpose.  To raise the standard of living of my family and to contribute to their happiness by living the life I love.  I can offer travel opportunities, I can arrange visits and spend that precious commodity: time.  I can and do share the gift of health and vitality that I have been so fortunate to discover. 

I feel a strong emotional connection to friends; always have.  Maybe because of frequent moves, maybe it was in my DNA and perhaps it is my habit formed from positive reinforcement of generous love by having heartfelt connection to other human beings.  Wherever it originated, I rejoice that I have good friends!  I love to spend time with friends, in person is the best.  Travel to foreign lands with friends where we walk and discover together how the world works and how it came to be as it is; to take steps on cobblestone walkways where many, many millions have walked before us; particularly women friends, soul sisters and women holding hands around the world; this has become my “why”.

To travel this wide world in emotional capsules of love and connection, is my “why”.  To discover Her-story on the planet and to share in deep understanding of how it is and how it will be, is my “why”.  To give back and pay it forward in acts of kindness to the ones I love, and also to those whose path crosses mine on my adventures, is my “why”.  To further explore vital energy and fitness of the body, as well as continue on a path of life-long learning and exploration of social networks and to offer relationship support in achieving higher and higher financial standing of women globally, is my “why”.  I want to live in a world where women are financially invincible, fit and having fun.  That world offers happy children and a future for all persons. 

When I found my “why”, I sat with it and let it wash over me in waves, as if sitting on the shore as the tide comes in on the Bay of Fundy.  First appearing slow and gentle with the rise and fall of the water line; then, as if by magic, suddenly it seems that I am immersed in this vision and I have goose bumps and tears in my eyes.

The journey that I walk on is mine and it is personal: it is political and it is of vital importance to my soul.  

Why do you do what you do?  What stirs deep inside your being, reaching down into your gene pool and pulling out the core of your existence, your reason for being and doing?  Share with me, if you care to.  I will be happy to bare witness to your journey.  Travel with me in spirit and let’s do what we came here to do. 

Chapter 2. The continuing saga. Still Thursday 18 June 2009, now 1:44 pm local time, YVR
I have found a bathroom that allows me to bring all my lime green luggage in with me ….. you know how that is for women … . I am frequenting the lovely room and they keep it pretty clean here. I have had a wee bit of lunch, Canadian style “greek”cuisine of salmon and greek salad, diet coke. Who knows when I will get to eat what I can actually read on the menu again!! Travels and eating for gluten free diet is always a challenge even in my own country – can’t imagine in Europe. I am thinking maybe I will find a good weight loss strategy after all … except chocolate is probably just as wonderful no matter where I find it!
People watching is interesting here – people coming and going, here and there, up and down, sit and walk, looking – always looking. I wonder if all people are searching for the same thing in airports? Is it something to grab their interest? Is it a bathroom? Is it a familiar face? Is it the dreaded security section or perhaps more exotic interests like duty – free shopping? I have not yet gone through security and the office for KLM does not even open for another hour. I did ask for clarification at the ever-so-helpful information desk. I like the well placed and highly sought after info desk …. makes travels more friendly and less “I am all alone and lost” kind of feeling.
I wonder the route my airplane will take as it heads to Amsterdam?? Let’s not get too ahead of myself just yet. Remember to stay in the present .. take it all in. A constant reminder in my head. Breathe, don’t forget to breathe. It will be as it will be, the task this trip is to notice.
I am seeing some familiar faces as I sit at this counter looking out into the foyer, I wonder if they are lost or just spending time like me …. round and round we go …together … turning with the earth in preparation for air travel to another place.
Some with matching luggage, holding hands. Some barely acknowledging each others existence, some bubbling over with excitement, some looking a bit bored and lonely. What an intriguing place to share space with humanity.
There is a very large screen just off to my right, up high on the wall with scenes of Canada I presume and the odd add for Olympics to come. Fireplace, food preparation, no sound – just the visual. I wonder who has that job?? to decide what is or might be a pleasure for folks as they walk around in circles? There is that same couple again ….. see how much I can notice when I just watch.
I think I might do the same in a while … stroll around in circles …. <grin> maybe they know something that I don’t …..
It will be late tomorrow night local time in Germany when I land. I wonder how long I will travel. That whole time zone thing is very trippy (pun intended) and kind of interesting. Do we age differently if we change time zones?? how is it with the body to go across the date line? Will I notice? Feel refreshed or feel like I have lost a day sleep? Maybe there is nothing to notice … just to sit with what is and
**** a person just stopped and started talking to me …. about travel and places, german and french, difference and the same. He asked if I was working … that is how it started. I said “no, writing to my home” was what my unexpected voice responded. He is a security person here – from Africa, lives in Tsawwassen.
I guess in a manner of speaking, I am working. I am learning, I am traveling and learning. I am on my familiarization cruise tour compliments of my new part time job. Yes, I am working. Yes I am learning. Yes, this is my life. How unexpectedly sweet my life is …. all parts
Sending these notes to friends and family – keeping them for my own record of my travels for when I am old-er I may want to re-read and re-experience the moments I carefully am saving in my mind.
Like making a movie – to be watched and re-watched. Everyone will have a different version of the story and I will have made it, written it in my own world as it came to me. As I sit and watch. I am the main character but all have a part of importance.
Watching shoes, people, time, faces, energy, direction, expressions, eyes, the screen, the food, the foyer, the stores, the info booth, young people and not-so-young people. It is all here at YVR any time for anyone – make that everyone to enjoy. What a glorious place and a wondrous life
I am busting with gratitude, filled with awe, many questions … many moments to capture.
Thank you thank you – for all that has lead me to this space and this time – for coming with me and for guiding me with your light.
ENTRY 3
It is my third entry and second day of travel, and as yet I am still without more than moments of stolen sleep. I have been most of this day in the Amsterdam airport, following an all night flight from Vancouver…. and waiting for my last flight to Nuremburg.
Last night – the flight was long, the plane was nice and the service was amazing. KLM was the company and although they had no prior knowledge of my food allergies, tried to accommodate as best they could. Wine was free!! Amazing what free wine can do to make the weary traveler feel just a wee bit more cared for! Good for them! And a special decaf coffee with Bailies, complimentary of course!
They gave me yogurt and salad and then some to take with me this morning as well. It was a huge plane and filled every seat. Mostly families traveling, I sat in the middle section, back of the plane, on an aisle (there was no real options, the aisle was my choosing) with almost no leg room. It was challenging. Movies were fun, and somehow in that very very small space I lost my Westjet headset that I had carefully packed for use with the lap top. I guess it was absorbed by the larger European plane …. I now have a two pronged one compliments of KLM however, won;t work on the lap top. It is a mystery to me how the Westjet one got lost …. it is not like I was walking around or anything … sat still for 8 and ½ hours …. maybe it got lost in the time zone change??? over the dateline?? It seemed we just left, headed north over Edmonton, and very cold temperatures outside according to the plane information provided … maybe over Norway?? I had to move my watch time 2 hours back when we arrived …. 10 hours later here ….. and there was almost no darkness last night outside the windows!! Magical night for sure.
And now in Amsterdam, the Netherlands –
I found a comfy lounge chair to sit in all day and read. I watched the weather and planes outside, listened to announcements in foreign accents and generally had peace around me. Not being adventurous on my own, I did not step out and wander much …. just a few moments ago I found a sign that said there is a meditation center here and wireless connection. I have decided to write an entry, and maybe go find a few minutes of meditation in this large spacious airport – before I seek out my next terminal. There are duty free shops everywhere – lots of cities being announced, peoples names called out who are late for their flights …. with notice their bags will be taken off the plane. That would just be nasty!!!
Places include, Milan, Rome, Paris — oh the places people are going!!! Lots of English spoken here – and of course, Dutch. Memories as I wander …. wooden shoes, tulips, gouda cheese … all and more being sold in this airport. Memories from a time long long ago, and not so far away .. Germany and Holland in 1967 with my family. Familiar sites nevertheless. Chocolates, of course are international!! the packaging might be different but the contents I certainly recognize. The duty free shops offer perfumes and make up in familiar names, even crocs (shoes) are sold here in many colors!! I look for a suitable bag to drag home as a new addition to my luggage, but nothing jumps right out at me. Hard to sort out prices as well… I keep trying to recall 1.6 Euro …. so it means doing the math and takes the quick mindless purchases to a minimum (lucky me!!). Perhaps shopping in Europe will be much less painful than I had first predicted!
I see Guerlain products and recall becoming a fan many years ago with my friend Verona …. then I found them at Walt Disneyworld at Epcot center in the France pavilian … and now … in Amsterdam airport in the duty free shops. I love the flood of memories of previous stories.
OOOOOPs, someone who is late for feparture to Prague, and another one for Lisbon … “or we will proceed to off load your baggage” ….. the kind announcers say over the loud speaker for all the folks to hear.
Well, I must go find that meditation space just to say I did it … maybe have a moment there. Then on to find my departure gate …. I would not want them to off load my lime green baggage!! I guess at least then I would know if for sure it is really and truly following me around the world and will be at my final destination when I need it the most.
The end of another page. A time zone of 10 hours ahead of all of you … who says tomorrow never comes!!! it did for me last night ….. <grin> And I am living my tomorrow today!!

My EVERYDAY blog

Welcome and good morning.  How do I do it?  Here are a few simple reminders for me and duplicate-able steps for anyone.

1. My future has nothing to do with my past: and every thing to do with what I do today.
2. My self talk is the most important voice in my day.
3. I take a step.  I take a small step, ever onward, toward my climb to success.
4. My attitude is my sail and determines my destination, as well as my journey.
5. I face the opportunities and see the progress.
6. I forgive all and offer generosity.  I smile.  I practice gratitude, optimism and positivity.
7. I look for mentors who have what I am looking to achieve.  I follow what they say and do.
8. I dream big; I dream often.  I live my dream.
9. I meditate, journal, read and listen.  I connect to others and listen to their story.
10. I matter and make a significant contribution to as many lives as I touch in a day.

A weekend of love for Grammie

On one of the busiest weekends of the year, August long weekend, I loaded my car with treasures on the Thursday night. Large stuffed sea otter from Alaska cruise; check. One quarter of my treasured 100% cotton quilt fabric in large white garbage bags; check. Serger machine in box; check. A large bag of small stuffed animals, birds, bears and more of the same; check.

Carefully selected for the recipients. My eldest daughter is self sufficient and successful beyond her years. She and her husband are building their second home and she wants to make stuff out of quilt fabric. She wants to use the serger. The grand boys will want to open treasures too – hence the abundance of stuffies!

The most important reason for this last minute trip: to see and hold and hug and love those grandbabies. My heart skips a beat as I prepare. Will Luke remember me? Why do I have this fear? Say the mantra and let it go. “I love you; I am sorry; please forgive me; thank you”. Releasing the voices of my memories and self doubts that may have started in many generations past. Poof, in the moment, they are gone. Leaving me with my excitement and anticipation of a wonderful adventure that I surely will remember in my heart the remainder of my days.

I leave from Victoria and start driving. Some 8 hours later I arrive at their home and am ushered in to the room at the resort where we stay while the house is being built. All are sleeping. My excitement will stay with me till morning.

Early I am woken by the sound of the phone, my daughter says “we are up, come on over”. I say the mantra to clear the doubts and space and leave only inspiration.

I rush. As I walk toward their place there he is -in the hallway and he begins to run. Arms outstretched, knowing his grammie is there. A bit of shyness as he searches the recesses of memory from several months ago and finds me. He hugs me. My day is complete. Should no other wonderful moment happen this day, I have found the pinnacle of my success. I have felt the dream come true. I explode in love for this little boy. His mom watches on and I feel such love for the little girl that I raised and the mom she has become.

Fast forward a few days and I am now heading home. Back to Victoria. I shed tears as I left and hoped he would not see. I don’t want him to have one sad moment from our visit. Savor only the precious hugs, books we read and songs we sang. Ice cream we ate, animals we saw at the farm, muffins we made in the heat of the day, juice we drank, jammies we put on, baths he had, meals we ate, kisses we shared. Goldfish kisses, he is starting to learn. Buckets of kisses from grammie … as we read from one of the books about how to fill up the buckets of your loved ones. “When the moon hit’s the sky, like a big pizza pie, that’s amore, la la la la la la.” He learns new words, Pinnochio, electricity, cinnamon, zucchini.

I cried for a while, feeling nothing but love and a tightness in my heart for this relationship.

Till next time, little one. And for Jack as he also grows old enough to remember his Grammie. I send hugs and love bigger than I can describe.